I was coaching in Romania earlier this month, providing one-to-one support for the participants of the Alpha Leadership Bootcamp. They were all aged between 16 and 25 years old and all but one were native Romanians.

They weren't a select few from academia, they weren't necessarily on a mission to save the world or indeed themselves. Most had been sent by their parents. Some were shy, some ambitious, some had a dream they wanted to fulfil, but many were unsure about the future or what they wanted from it.

The Alpha Leadership Bootcamp is the brainchild of author, trainer and coach Andy Szekely, a Romanian whose thinking stems from a background of NLP, Transactional Analysis and Experiential Learning. It explores the impact of connecting clear vision with positive intention, genuine passion with personal mastery. Simply put, the Bootcamp floods light onto the qualities that make a leader great.

Alignment forms an essential part of the equation. It's one of those tricky terms to define as it has so many connotations for the individual as well as a team. The aspect that I'm passionate about is the mind/body connection – those grounded moments of mental, physical and emotional integration when you really know what you want (as opposed to what you think you want). Then, success without struggle becomes possible as thoughts, feelings and actions line up with the vision and goal you're aiming for.

Of course, beliefs and values play an important role in leadership too. The invitation to participants was to explore their own unique set. Are they really helpful? What could be more useful?

This was like rain falling on fertile ground and, over the week, I saw new shoots of creativity, self-confidence, purpose, focus, determination and genuine love, compassion and support emerging on all sides.

With so much conversation, inspiration and energy in one small rural space, my experience in Romania was like getting a shot of adrenaline. It reminded me just how much the people I spend time with matter.

It also emphasised the fact that I never want to stop growing and learning - and that the only way to do this is with an open heart and mind. And maybe a translator.

About a month ago, a man I'd never met walked into my flat and we had a conversation. We talked about deeply personal things then, two hours later, he gave me a hug and left.

He wasn't a therapist, coach or counsellor and I'm not in the habit of inviting strange men into my home for an exchange of verbal intimacies. He was an exception to my rule because he was there for a very good reason.

Yesterday, I listened to the recording of our conversation. I listened to myself talking about those deeply personal things. I listened. And in doing so, I gave myself a voice I'd never had before.

Karl James runs The Dialogue Project. He records people talking about difficult subjects to show that it's possible to discuss them; it's possible to be honest. He's using dialogue, in his own words, to 'create better understanding and positive change in a challenging world'. That was why he came to my flat - and a good enough reason to let him in.

As a life coach, I do a lot of listening - the kind that has to be free of judgement, criticism or the need to come up with a bigger and better story than the one I'm listening to.

It's a powerful thing being heard.

And Karl did for me what I aim to do for others. He created a safe space to explore a subject that mattered. By the end of it, I felt more like me. I felt... integrated. Listening to the recording now, I can hear it.

And the version of me - that strange voice captured on tape like a message from the other side - has plenty to say to the me who's sitting here right now.

Of course there are many different aspects to the person I am, each having something useful to say about what will make me happy. There's the little girl who swings her legs and giggles - she tells me not to take life too seriously - and there's the twinkling, strong, independent old woman of my future who reminds me who I could become. But for now, I choose to listen to the Olivia of last month. The one who surprised me. Because she deserves to be heard.

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