From relationship ruts to work routine, being stuck is a leading cause of frustration and a dab hand at killing creativity, passion and inspiration stone dead.
It breeds helplessness, nurtures self-doubt and gives you many astoundingly good reasons – all negative – not to get out of bed in the morning.
If feeling stuck is familiar, you might also have had the sense that it’s you who’s keeping you there. Which makes the whole situation even more annoying. Why am I wasting time? Why don’t I know where to go next? Why am I so confused? Why do other people seem so focused and successful? What’s wrong with me? Choose the appropriate stick and beat yourself with it. Because obviously that will help.
Now I’m more of a carrot than a stick kind of girl. I know that fear is supposed to be one of life’s great motivators, but personally I find it paralysing, reductive and constricting. Pleasure on the other hand… Now there’s something to get out of bed for.
So perhaps we can start looking at stuck a little differently.
Based on the simple idea that what we resist persists, firstly I suggest learning to…
Let stuck be
So today, this week, this month even, make the choice not to change anything at all. In fact, decision-making is strictly off limits. Give yourself permission to eat with stuck, work with stuck and sleep with stuck. Become intimately acquainted with your own particular brand of going nowhere. The only condition is that you do it wholeheartedly.
Funnily enough, when we don’t try and shut it out, stuck stops feeling like a trap and starts feeling like a place you can emerge from.
Let your body make a break for it
Stuck is just head and heart stuff
By taking a step back from them and knowing they don’t define you, you give yourself some breathing space – and oxygen is extremely good for you.
Give your fears a voice
Firstly, those fears are allowed. They’re doing their bit to protect you. Here’s an example…
You don’t like your job, you’re stuck in a rut and you’re really miserable - but what would happen if you leave? You’ll have to prove yourself all over again, you might not get another job, you’ve got family to support, you’d be an idiot to leave a well-paid position, a regular income means security… No wonder making the leap is tough!
Get your fears out in the open and you can take control of them and find ways to soothe them, rather than letting them run amuck with paralysing ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’.
Write down whatever’s on your mind or talk to someone about it – a good life coach can help you with this one!
Create another you
Start creating an unstuck version of you with a vision board on paper or Pinterest. Explore the life that happens after stuck, because there will be one, so why not be ready for it and put the champagne on ice?
Photo via Daniela from the Photographic project